We often place expectations on others or believe we know what is best for them. The fact is, however, we are all on our own individual and unique journeys, and rather than place emotional demands on them or be judgmental and tell them how to live their lives, we should let them go to "do their thing." Of course, there is a time and place for everything, and a person in a role of responsibility should not necessarily always be prioritizing their own needs and wants and possibly neglecting their commitments as a result. Ideally, a person should be free to pursue their own form of self-actualization while still tending to their duties. The journey is then often about learning how to balance or possibly even combine the two.
Today I realized that saying "no" also means saying no to myself. I typically thought that when I was told that I had to learn to say "no," that it was in relation to demands that other people placed on me, these demands being of my time, money, etc. However, now at this stage of my healing journey where I am writing this, I now see that it is just as important to say "no" to myself, especially in regard to bad habits. It is my opinion that in order to be a healthy person, one must have a good handle on self-discipline, and this is, in part, done by being very strict, or at least mindful, about the activities one chooses to pursue and the thoughts one chooses to entertain. To some people this comes naturally; to others, like me, it takes conscious effort.